i guessed i realised ..

OMG ! this is the third time i'm posting ! hahas ..
i just finished watching Hachi Ko , a dog's story few mins ago ..
the movie was nice ! especially to animal lovers !

i learnt something from the movie ! it's
' you should never forget who you love/loved . '
after seeing this sentence , i suddenly felt that i've taken too many ppl for granted ..
i should be sparing a thought , i'm not sure if i'm alrd doing that .. but even if i'm alrd doing that , i think it's not enough .. i need to know what's wrong and what's right , i guess i know that alrd ..
the problem is , i think i've taken certain ppl for granted , too much .. and so , it's time to start cherishing them ! yest my birthday didn't turn out perfect though , this and that happened .. cried again at night , for no good reason .. i didn't listen to you , you're right .. now that i'm still able to hear her talk , i should appreciate it .. i will never know when i'll never hear her talk or nag again .. yes , everyone of us has our own problems , but if we never initiate to tell , ppl will never know .. just like what happened last night , if i don't initiate to tell her my troubles , she'll never know .. i finally know , she needs someone to listen to her troubles .. i did listen to you , i looked at you while you were not facing me .. and suddenly felt that i don't want to lose my loved ones , and only regret when you all are gone .. i imagined the scene when you all weren't in my life anymore , it's hurtful .. i don't know how to carry on with life .. i know no matter what happens in life , we've to face it and move on .. but how can i when i lost all my loved ones .. this was how i felt when i thought of the situation .. my mum once said to me , " if you've cherished that person when he/she is still alive , you don't need to cry when they're gone . cos' you know you have treasured the times with them . " this is what i want to change into , i want to treasure the times with my loved ones .. cos' i'll never know when their time is up , or when my time is up
i feel so bad for being so selfish .. sometimes i just don't feel like caring abt things , forever .. but it never did me any good .. maybe i should just try to listen to ppl .. i want to be a better listening ear , listen to others , listen to myself and to advices ..
boonsiong , sorry abt yest .. sorry that i keep hurting you , just because of my own frustration .. i should just learn to control my emotions .. it's not easy , have been trying since last yr .. jiayous !

cos' i know that someday you'll be gone .
i'll change , sorry .