not worth the hurt ?

heys ! i'm back to update again ! hahas ..
feeling sad right now , but i guess i'll get over it soon ..
so if you want to cont. reading , pls bear with my rantings .. thank you ! :)

i feel like i've always been taken for granted , be it in school , at home , from friends , from relationship , from family .. i've taken ppl for granted too , but at least i reflected and tried to change ! i don't care if those ppl have ever reflected and tried to change cos' i think ppl like to step over the line just because i don't retaliate ..
but i've learnt today , i realised that i have to treat certain ppl less than how i've always been treating them ..
i'm not going to be as good as i was before ..
i don't like to be treated like some shit !
i realised i was hurt today , but i kept silent .. all along i was keeping silent , but that doesn't mean those ppl can take it for granted .. i kept silent so we don't quarrel .. but enough is enough ..
i'm not going to tolerate it anymore .. i'm not a toy you can play with when you're feeling good and put it aside when you have something better to do or someone better to talk to !
i hope i'm not a replacement nor a back up ..
i don't like to quarrel , moreover it's over ... not worth it right ?
i actually felt like crying , felt like hurting myself .. but it's not worth the hurt .. hahas ..
i've learned , and i'm not going to be so stupid anymore ..
DON'T TREAT ME LIKE SHIT , I'M NOT A TOY .
i'm not trying to pin point or offend anybody , but if you feel guilty for ever doing this to someone before , then maybe you're the one ? hahas how will i know ? but an advice for you .. REFLECT .

i'm mentally stress !!
sometimes , i feel like many things have happened when it actually didn't ..
i feel like i have had enough .. i don't know how to start telling my problems to anyone i know , anymore ..
i really want to get it off my chest for a little while .. but i'm tired of saying it again and again .. i know i can choose not to say , but i need someone to listen to me !
everytime i say , i will feel like crying .. but i just have to push back the tears .. cos' ppl are ard , and if i want to cry , i will cry for very long ..
i pretend that i'm so used to the pain alrd .. but actually it's hurting like hell inside , nothing can ever describe the pain and i think nobody will ever understand how painful it is ..
you may know my troubles , but you'll never feel the hurt there ..

i just hope i won't get affected by my troubles ..
i will be ok :) no . that's fake ! hahas LOL ..
byebyes !

not my problem anymore .