hell0s readers ! sorry that I left my blog on priv. mode cos' I was busy with school ! =D
and I'm back now !!! =DDD miss my posts ?? hahahas I wonder who reads my blog ~
and yupp , I've changed the blog layout , added Formspring , edited some things and changed my photo ! :)
so if you've got anything to ask , can ask me in Formspring if not just leave a tag !
I think I'll be posting a lot nowadays ? hahahas unless I'm busy with work ?
for now , I'll post on school and family ~
SCHOOL
O LEVEL HAS FINALLY ENDED !!!!!!!!! yays !!!!!
OMG I awaited for this day for a very long time and it has finally ended !!!! =DDD
I'm sure all O level candidates are ' flying ' now ~ LOL ..
so , I was really busy preparing for O levels , revising every single day ~
I can say that my effort was paid off , though I haven't got back results , but O levels was a breeze ~
except for Combined Humanities and AMath , I'm pretty confident that I'll be able to do well for the other subjects ! :)
I was quite surprised by the degree of difficulty for EMath and Combined Science .. hahas ..
everytime I feel like giving up , I remind myself that this is what would determine my future .. I don't want to see those results I got in the first half of Sec 3 ever again !
this year was really stressful , with teachers pressuring us , the countdown to O levels on the board , with so many worksheets thrown at us ..
and I'm so glad it is finally over ! I'm so proud of myself , proud of the effort I put in .. did topical TYS , yearly TYS , other schools' prelim papers ~ wow .. hahas !
there were times when I really wanted to give up , when I felt like withdrawing from O levels .. glad I didn't ! hahas ..
I can't believe I have finally completed 5 long years of Secondary education ~
been so long .. I was still dreading for O levels to start and when it just started , I was longing for it to end .. and now , it has really really ended .. kind of felt empty when I walked out of school just now .. like I've no idea what to do next .. I'm happy that O level has ended , the stress is finally gone , I don't need to revise anymore .. but it just felt so weird ~ LOL
anyway to the ppl who are still taking some other papers , good luck and strive on ! it's ending alrd ! =D
this school year was also the year that I went to visit the counsellor for like more than 5 times ?
I'm not mentally ill ok , I just needed professional help , professional ppl to care for me and guide me .
I'll elaboarate a little more at the ' family ' section :)
oh well ...
O level ended .. wooooooooooooooooooo ~~~~~! ♥
FAMILY
hmm .. what to say ? I'm just glad that bad things didn't happen at home during this crucial period :)
bad things as in running away from him , violence etc.
there were times that bad things did happen , causing me to miss school and also the reason why I had to see the counsellor for so many times ..
usually I could counsel myself and get myself up on the feet again ..
but maybe it was cos' of the overwhelming stress I felt from my family , studies and friendship .. I somehow almost fell into depression ?
I'm glad I didn't , glad I tried to ignore and distracted myself .. and of cos' with the help of some ppl ! =D
things are not SO bad at home this year , as compared to the past 2 years .. which was chaotic ~
I remember seeing a quote once in the counselling room ,
' 10% is what happens to your life , 90% is how you react to it . ' ..
this quote helped me a lot .. oh ya , I got 2 counsellors , LOL .. the first one kind of woke me up ..
he told me , " your mum has only you to nag to . " .. that's why now I seldom complain when she nags at me .. cos' I'm trying my best to let her feel loved , to let her know that I'm there for her .. though I'm very annoyed at times , but I try to keep my cool cos' I don't want her to feel sad , don't want to hurt her ..
of cos' , there were times I lost my cool and said really mean things to her and felt bad afterwards .. I try to make up to her by eating dinner with her or buying things for her and reminding myself not to say things hurtful to her again .. I'm better at it now :)
there was one time when I was soooooooo sad that I felt like ending everything ..
then my second counsellor told me , " look for those little little miracles . " .. meaning to look for times at home when things were fine , my parents were happy with each other .. I didn't want to believe that it would work .. but I tried anyway .. I felt better after a few times .. I wasn't as sad as I was before and I started to accept things ..
I'm kind of happy that I have to go through hard times , go through all those hurt and betrayal ..
if not for my family background , I wouldn't have become who I am today ..
life becomes easier when we learn to accept things :)
I'll see if I've got the time to blog on other aspects of life later on ~ if not I'll blog some other day .. stay tune ! :)
